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Monday, 18 January 2016

Why you should be masturdating

You may remember in September, I proclaimed this year to be the 'year of me'. Well now I have decided to take this one step further and indulge in the art of masturdating.  Masturdating is all about spending some time doing something you enjoy in your own company and feeling comfortable with it. This could be going to the cinema, theatre, out for a meal or maybe just a coffee. By yourself and completely alone. Kind of like a solo date.

"I quite enjoy going for a coffee and toastie on my own and at first I feel silly but then there's always people siting by themselves i like it" - Amy Louise

I was watching Loose Women last week (a little bit of a guilty pleasure when I'm on my lunch break) and all of the ladies on the panel agreed, masturdating is wonderful and spending time in your own company doing something just for you can be very empowering.

"I go out for a meal/ coffee by myself all the time! I travel up and down the country a canny bit so I'm not missing out on trying new places just because I'm by myself! It's never really bothered me" - Kelly Schweizer

Whether you fancy a trip to the cinema or theatre, pop out to your favourite coffee shop or even visit a gallery you have always wanted to in your home town, masturdating doesn't have to have any stigma attached to it and can be just as fun for single people or those in relationships.

"Yes, I've been to the cinema a few times by myself. I wanted to see a movie. I watch tv by myself. What's the difference really?" - Helena Blakemore

So I have a plan - I'm going to take myself on a date once every two weeks and visit somewhere that is just for me. I really want to catch Christmas with the Coopers at the cinema however all of my friends and family say it looks rubbish. I know they are probably right about the film but rather than missing out I have decided to just go and see it by myself. I used to go to the cinema all of the time by myself when I was pregnant and on maternity leave with my first baby (there wasn't much else to do!) and loved it, it was just oh so indulgent. I would really like to start getting back into the habit. How cheeky would it feel taking an afternoon off work and escaping to the cinema!

"There's nothing wrong with eating alone. Don't know why the stigma exists!" - Jeff Lyall

I know it can be scary taking yourself on a date and I can't help but immediately think that people are looking at me thinking why am I by myself. This really isn't the case though and I just think in my head that if I saw someone by themselves I would think they were really confident in their own company and good for them so surely that's what they must think when they see me?

"I love going to the movies on my own! Sometimes I buy 2 seats so I don't have to sit next to anyone! Ha!" - Pixie Tenenbaum

This week I decided to trial my first solo date with a day trip to Newcastle. Instead of nipping into my usual shops and then immediately travelling home, I decided to turn the trip into an indulgent shopping experience. I started with breakfast at Mason + Rye in Fenwick food hall and then made the decision to spend the rest of the time shopping for me, I mean I honestly don't remember the last time that happened! Most probably around 10 years ago I think.

I spent some time indulging in my favourite shops - I popped to Lush where I picked myself up a bath bomb for the weekend, I bought some new Liz Earle Cleanse & Polish from Boots and told myself I could absolutely not feel guilty about spending £16+ on a cleanser and finally headed to Goldsmiths Newcastle to browse their fantastic range of jewellery and watches. Can you remember the last time you bought yourself a piece of jewellery? I certainly can't. The lovely staff helped me to find the perfect gift to myself and do you know what, it felt fantastic!

"I'd love to be able to do this, but with 2 little ones, it never happens. Sounds like bliss to me!" - Joanne Graham

I know my luxury shopping experience was fairly indulgent and I would like to point out that taking yourself out on a date every now and then doesn't even have to be expensive. After my cinema trip I plan to visit a few local National Trust places that we never seem to have the time to visit together as a family, I'd like to book a couple of restaurants I've been meaning to try for lunch and then who knows - I feel as if the world is my oyster!

Masturdating is a powerful and liberating experience that sends your brain a message that YOU matter and should be respected. Now is the time to be responsible for your own happiness and take yourself out on dates doing something YOU enjoy. If you treat yourself and fill your life with love and kindness, this can only be a good thing right?

Do you take yourself on solo dates? Do you think they benefit your wellbeing? I'd love to hear your thoughts.



  1. When I used to work from home I'd do this all of the time. It's so nice to spend time by yourself, I really miss it.

    Katie xoxo

  2. Wow this title through me for a moment lol great idea though great post x

  3. Hmm. This would definitely be a massive challenge for me. I might try it.

  4. I'm the most independent person, I love time on my own as much as I love time with others, even worldwide travel no longer phases me in fact I think travel on your own is way less stressful than it is with kids or husbands. I think you might have just inspired a blog post ;)

    1. Yes, travelling by yourself is super stress free!

  5. Being a single girl and running my own business I quite often just decide at a whim to do something like shop, go for a meal, go for a drink. Even a trip abroad for 7 months alone didn't phase me that much once I plucked up the courage to go to a restaurant alone. Love this post Samantha!

  6. I love solo dates although I admit I went on far more when I lived in London. I'd frequently go to the cinema or theatre on my own and even went out for full on three course meals solo. The best thing about me time is that you can be selfish and do whatever you want!

  7. I get to do this all the time - I'd love a real date (with a gorgeous guy!!!!

  8. Just today I sat in town and had lunch by myself. I found it quite peaceful not having to see to my brood at the same time. Ill hopefully be able to do it more often. Glad you enjoyed your time out :)

    1. Oh it's lovely and peaceful having lunch by yourself isn't it x

  9. Sounds like you had a nice day, I like Mason and Rye :)

    I quite enjoy my own company so it doesn't phase me going to town on my own. I haven't been to a restaurant on my own though, I'm not sure what I would do on my own with no one to talk to. I wouldn't mind going to the cinema or theatre as you don't really speak to people anyway whilst there.

    I think people including me can worry too much about what others think

    Ami x

    1. When you go out for a meal by yourself it's the perfect opportunity to lose yourself in a spot of people watching xx

  10. Ha! That title totally threw my for a loop! Oh my goodness, lol. But now that I've read the post I am 100% behind it. We should all master the art.


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